It’s discomforting to know that the election will be decided by a small group of Americans known in today’s climate of political correctness as”undecideds”.

When I was growing up, these people were called: morons.

The Wall Street Journal recently published an article about these morons undecideds, and sure enough, there is ample evidence that suggests many members of this prestigious voting bloc possess a diminished mental capacity.

Let’s take a look:

BOARDMAN, Ohio — Joe Sullivan worked his way through a cheese pizza during Friday’s presidential debate, and as the candidates argued over the idea of face-to-face talks with rogue states, he couldn’t help but think of his own divorce two years ago.

Wait. Was it the debate that reminded Joe of his ex-wife, or was it that cheese pizza? Either Joe the Moron’s ex-wife had some nasty infection, or the rogue nation chatter on t.v. got Joe’s wheels a-turnin. Based on the article, one cannot be certain.

However, I do sense that Joe must absorb the information he gathers from the news, dumb it down, and personalize it by playing out his divorce before he can comprehend what the hell anyone is talking about. This is not good.

Personally, I believe Barack Obama is dangerously unqualified to be Commander-in-Chief. And I don’t need an inept friend or relative to know this…..

"It’s always better to communicate," said Mr. Sullivan, who is 55 years old. "It’s the most important thing you can do; countries, people, doesn’t matter."

Countries, like buildings or trees, actually have no ability to communicate. It’s always people, Joe. If this guy is a "typical undecided", I’m beginning to feel a bit concerned…..
Mr. Sullivan is a registered Democrat who’s struggling. He worked 19 years in newspaper circulation before the industry’s dwindling fortunes cornered him into a buyout. These days, he cuts hair during the week and performs as Jocko the Clown on weekends.

You’ve got to be kidding me. Is this what I have to look forward to with my degree in Mass Communication?

Let’s take a look at another “undecided” voter:

Ron Eiselstein, a grocer and real estate investor in nearby Poland… Like Sen. Obama, the 48-year-old man was born in Hawaii and educated in Southeast Asia. Mr. Eiselstein’s mother is Filipino and his father was white.

Maybe it’s just because we share so much in common, but I was really hopeful he would be the one," Mr. Eiselstein said. His enthusiasm diminished for Sen. Obama after revelations about the views of the Illinois lawmaker’s pastor, the Rev. Jeremiah Wright.

After watching the debate with his wife, Mr. Eiselstein said the balance had tipped to Mr. McCain. Watching him at the podium, Mr. Eiselstein said he thought of his father, a Green Beret and Vietnam veteran.

His father had such a commanding presence, Mr. Eiselstein said, that all he would have to do was stare at any of his seven sons and they’d jump to attention.

“My dad exuded authority," Mr. Eiselstein said. "So does McCain, and that’s what we need right now."

Now, if only Sarah Palin reminds Mr. Eiselstein of his Aunt Martha — who once took a trip to Alaska and brought back lots of pretty pictures and key chains and stuff — then perhaps McCain might be able to wrap this election up…

‘Cause Aunt Martha made Ron happy. And we could sure use us some happy right about now.

COMMENT HERE